Okay Mamas, we are about four weeks into summer time here in Texas….
How’s your Summer going??
Hopefully you have had time to play at the pool, sleep in, maybe go see one of this summer’s great movies….
Mine, oh, thanks for wondering…..I am enjoying being able to sleep in a bit, having more time with my boys and more time to spend with friends. The boys enjoyed a couple camps to kick the summer off and now they are in the long haul at daycare when I am in the office. The movies this summer have us anxious for the next one and we love our long summer days playing in the pool. We are looking forward to our family vacation next week and the birth of my first nephew any day now. So far my summer is going pretty good!
Hubby and I snuck away last weekend for a little staycation for our anniversary which was much needed. We found ourselves talking about parent guilt (yes, not just Mom guilt as he struggles with Dad guilt at times too). As we were at the adult only pool, swimming up to the bar for our next cocktail, relaxing, talking, listening to music, people watching, napping, you know all the things you can do when you are not on kid duty, we found ourselves missing our boys. Almost feeling guilty they were not with us having fun too. As we walked through the lobby and saw a family having a fun moment, hubby must have noticed my enjoyment witnessing their moment, asking me if that made me want the boys with us. Yes. Sure it did. But let’s be honest. If they were with us I’d be wishing we were having a kid free weekend. Don’t worry, the guilt did not interfere with our time away, but recognizing it and talking about it made it better.
Mom guilt does not stop there.
Another trigger for summer time mom guilt…our lazy days. The days the boys just seem to want to rest, watch TV, play with Legos, make something crazy from the many hidden gems in my craft room. Now I quickly dismiss the guilt with the reality that clearly they don’t want to rip-and-roll today or they would be complaining they are bored or asking for so and so to come over, or demanding we go to the pool. Truthfully, I don’t always want to get dressed and get out either. But the little mom quilt voice in my head says we should be doing something today.
There seems to be so much anxiety over “which camp is this week” and “what will I do if my kid gets bored” that we sometimes run ourselves crazy with summer scheduling. Truth is there is power in rest and doing nothing, and it is OK! We all need it. Time to decompress, rest, relax. Now don’t get me wrong this wont last long. I have noticed that by around dinner time they are suddenly ready to do something, which, here is Texas is perfect. Evenings are our favorite to go outside, play some street basketball, ride bikes and chat with neighbors.
Mom guilt does not stop there.
With the change in speed around the house this mama has not been cooking as much which means we are not eating as good as we usually do. Don’t get me wrong, we are not the healthiest eaters around here but I know we could be doing better. I do pride myself when I find a yummy, somewhat healthy food that everyone actually will eat. I was so thankful for the nice lady at Trader Joes the other day who saw me pilling my cart full in the frozen food isle. She asked me if I had tried their amazing tomato sauce with the frozen chicken strips I had in my hand. Why no, I had not, but I did and it was a Team Johnson win! So the guilt keeps striking me that dinner time is not at its best but I am still making their bellies happy.
Mom guilt does not stop there
But I am going to stop swimming in the mom guilt for now.
One things that IS working so far this summer is our Summer Time Screen Time checklist. The boys know exactly what they have to do before they even ask me if they can play electronics. And they are doing it! This way we are not in a daily power struggle about what they need to get done first. They just get it done! Truth is my boys do well with structure, when they know the drill they tend to do it. Less power struggles, less stress.
So, mamas….How’s your summer going?
If you feel like you are running circles around the city from one camp to the next, planning play date after playdate, barely unpacking from one get away before it is time to reload and hit the road again. I beg you to ask yourself if this is what you really want your summer to be like. Is this what your kids really want to be doing?
If you are living on PB&J, pizza and cereal for dinner…..okay maybe with some carrot sticks on the side. You are doing good enough! The kids are probably loving it and you are getting a break in meal planning and cleaning the kitchen. Keep working on those Pinterest meal plan pins for when school starts.
And if you feel your kids are driving you crazy asking when they can play X-box (or Playstation….no favorites here) print my Summer Screen Time checklist. Then they know what needs done before asking for the 1000th time.
I hope you are enjoying the break from making sure your kids are at least in the building before the bell rings, homework, reading minutes, baseball practice, basketball practice, football practice. Ughhh, I must stop. I hope you are enjoying the change in pace that summer brings, taking time to relax, rest, have some fun, even slack on some of your mom goals.