Some of us are quietly anticipating Sunday, Mother’s Day. The day we are served breakfast in bed and everyone waits hand and foot on us for once. The day we are showered in gifts sometimes homemade sometimes bought with Dad’s money. The day to do whatever we want because it is Mother’s Day.
Me personally I’d love to sleep in, have hot coffee ready when I wake (no need for breakfast in bed because let’s face it, who changes the sheets in this house), time to craft, time for snuggles and hopefully some Mexican food. Insert reality, we have a 10am football game, 1pm basketball game, 2pm football game so this means playing tag in 2 cars to ensure both boys are where they need to be on time. I might get lucky with some guacamole and a mambo taxi (or two ) for dinner.
Some of us are quietly not anticipating Sunday, Mother’s Day. Mother’s Day is sometimes a sad and disappointing day for single moms. No Dad in the house spearheading the breakfast in bed. No Dad in the house to offer up his Visa to buy gifts for Mom. No Dad in the house. Sure some kids can make it all happen, but let’s be honest, that is rare in this taken for granted world of motherhood.
Single Mom life is sometimes chosen and sometimes not. And even when it is chosen it is rarely what one hoped for. Single momhood is hard. Not a little hard. A lot hard. And sadly many single moms are forgotten on Mother’s Day.
My tribe has one special single mom. My bestie. We’ve known each other since middle school. We stood in each other’s weddings, we visited one another at the hospital as each of our children were born, I stayed with her when she told her husband to leave, we support one another in this difficult world of parenting and momlife, we meet for Mambos and guacamole when we can.
She told her husband to go when 3 of her 4 kids were in diapers so I am sure there have been plenty of Mother’s Days she did not get the day to do whatever she wanted let alone even sleep in. These days her ex-husband does not show up for visitation and often goes months not paying child support so he won’t be letting the kids use his Visa for that special gift for Mother’s Day.
Let’s be real here. For many, Mothers Day is not a Hallmark day. You may grieve your mom who is already with Jesus. You may grieve the child you lost to a miscarriage. You may grieve the child you cannot have. You may grieve your child who went before you to Heaven. You may grieve the husband you thought you had, but no longer do. you may grieve the marriage you always envisioned, but struggle to attain.
For many, Mother’s Day is just another day. Waking up to the footsteps down the hall, cereal on the floor, laundry calling your name, dust bunnies swirling in the corner. Cooking at home to save on the budget, kids fighting over who sits where to watch the movie you turn on just so you can have a few minutes to breathe, your husband giving you “the wink” because he assumes you want some for Mother’s Day. Does he not remember what go yall into this!
Don’t forget, every day is Mother’s Day. Everyday is a day to be grateful for our mom’s and grandmother’s who show up for us. Everyday is a day to be thankful for those sparkly eyes that tell you they love you. Everyday is a day to remember what a blessing it is to be called mom.
Don’t forget the single mom’s in your tribe on Mother’s Day. Let’s be honest, they deserved the breakfast in bed and being able to do whatever they want more than anyone. Single mom’s don’t get the day off, they don’t even get the evening off.
Don’t forget the single mom’s in your tribe. I challenge you to drop them a card in the mail, pick up the phone and call her Sunday or at the least, text her Sunday, Mother’s Day.