I AM THAT GIRL

GIRLS MATTER.

Girls receive over 3,000 messages a day telling them what they aren’t and I AM THAT GIRL exists to help them celebrate what they are.  I am that girl is a movement inspiring girls to love, express, and be exactly who they are.

My Girl…You have a beautiful heart and a beautiful mind. I love you! Mom

They have several local chapters of forward thinking girls & women on High School and College campuses. These chapters work to shift girl culture in America, by raising the standards for how girls treat themselves, each other, and the world.

When I spotted this noble venture on line, I was reminded that Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is rooted in exploring and challenging negative core beliefs individuals have about ourselves,  others, and the world. This type of therapy teaches the skills necessary to overcome negative & destructive patterns of thinking.

Cognitive behavioral therapy also helps to identify which factors are playing a role in maintaining a negative body image and works to address each one by teaching the skills necessary to allow healing to occur.

Once the negative thoughts have been identified and evaluated for truthfulness, it is time to replace them with positive, productive thoughts that create a favorable outcome. this involves practice and dedication but has been demonstrated to be extremely effective in breaking the cycle of negative thinking.

“As you grow older, you will discover that you have two hands. One for helping yourself, the other for helping others.” Maya Angelou

If you or someone you know suffers from body image problems, low self esteem, or body dysmorphic disorder, I would encourage you to contact a counselor in your area for guidance and support. Please take a minute today to visit I AM THAT GIRL.COM and take the pledge today!  I have done it…Now it’s your turn. http://www.iamthatgirl.com/

I, Angie Glancy, am that girl…

I have a brilliant heart and a beautiful mind. I am me, an amazing work in progress, and perfectly flawed. I promise to lift other girls up, have their backs, and make it safe for them to be exactly who they are. I’m on a mission to raise the standards for how we treat each other, how we treat ourselves, and how we treat the world. Every time I look in the mirror I’ll remind myself that I’m not alone, that my voice matters, and that I am enough.

 

https://instagram.com/iamthatgirl

Mommy Mind Make-Over…The Cognitive Triangle Explained

“All that we are is the result of what we have thought.”

This simple premise is the cornerstone of my work as a therapist.

I have found that the root of a client’s anxiety and/or depression is often directly related to his/her core beliefs about himself, others and the world around him. These beliefs, in combination with distorted thinking patterns, cause a great deal of emotional distress.

So it stands to reason that if we harness the power of our thoughts, we can directly influence our feelings & behaviors.  This idea is the backbone of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy.

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is a short term, goal-oriented psychotherapy treatment that takes a hands-on, practical approach to problem solving. Quite simply: changing your thoughts can change your life!

Sound too good to be true?  It’s not. With a lot of introspection and a little homework, you will be well on your way to mastering your mind.

In my upcoming blog posts, I will shed light on the core principles of CBT. Today, however, we will begin to explore  the foundation upon which CBT is built.

The first step in understanding CBT is to understand that feelings, actions, and thoughts are always connected.

Image result for CBT triangle

Here is an example of this triangle in action:

Situation:  I have an upcoming blog post deadline & a mountain of laundry looming in the other room. If my thought is…I’ll NEVER get this blog post done in time, I immediately feel ANXIOUS. This feeling of dread might cause me to avoid doing either task & instead, binge watch 1,000 episodes of Odd Mom Out.  

My negative (all or nothing-always /never) thinking in this situation led to anxiety and avoidance…Not to mention some serious mind sucking t.v. time…which does little to help me conquer the Everest of Underwear in the other room.

With a small mommy mind makeover, I will rewind this scenario & hopefully end up with a more productive outcome.

Situation:  I have an upcoming blog post deadline & a mountain of laundry looming in the other room. If my thought is…This blog post deadline is looming & so is the laundry. I’ve been in this situation before & I managed to get it all done. If I stay relaxed, I will be more productive.  As a result, I feel less ANXIOUS and more hopeful.  This new feeling of calm helps me to work on each task a little at a time and eventually get both of the tasks done. …Which in turn allows time for a glass of wine &  2 episodes of Odd Mom Out. 

This mind makeover is obviously a win/win for booze, BRAVO & Borax! 

Image result for quote about thoughts

Your homework this week is simple:

1) Put on your big girl panties… (Hopefully they’re clean!)

2)  Put a lot of thought into situations that trigger you to feel anxious, overwhelmed, etc..&  jot them down. 

3) Stay tuned….In upcoming posts, we will explore how to label these thoughts and (if they are irrational), change them.

 

Happy Mommin’ –

Angie Glancy

 

 

Friendship: Comes in Different Shapes and Sizes.

Friendship. What is friendship, really? According to Merriam Webster, friendship is defined as:

One attached to another by affection or esteem; A favored companion.
There are many definitions actually but I liked this one. I’ve had friendship on the brain because, well, I think about friendship, often. In a longing way. A gratuitous way. A confused way. So, I’m finding these definitions helpful in shedding a little light on what friendship is, and what it isn’t.

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Connecting with Your Kids: Why They Need It & Why You Need It, Too.

Here I am again – It’s a Sunday morning (my kids favorite time of day to throw their wildest tantrums). So I’m trying to breathe deep and remember why I don’t want to scream and yell when they are well, screaming and yelling. All I want to do is have my coffee and eat some oatmeal. Is that really too much to ask? According to a toddler, yes it is. Much, much to much to ask.

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Control Freak Under Construction

“Incredible change happens in your life when you decide to take control of what you do have power over instead of craving control over what you don’t.”- Steve Maraboli

Twas the 3 months before Christmas and all through the house, not a creature was stirring-namely my spouse. The stockings weren’t hung by the chimney with care & the tree was still boxed, in the attic somewhere.  My cherubs were nestled all snug in their beds, while holiday panic danced in my head…..(Doesn’t anyone realize that this whole house has to get decorated ASAP and in accordance with this year’s  holiday theme???)

I relay this Christmas rhyme (in May), not to demonstrate that I have lost my marbles, but to confess to you (and to myself) that I struggle with CONTROL ISSUES!!! I wish I could say that my control issues are “seasonal” or even “Christmas tree related”…they aren’t.

Turns out, my desire for control is a 365 day dilemma.

There….my secret is out. I am acknowledging my struggle…and acknowledgement is the first step toward change.

My second step led me to seek a solution. After all, I am in the business of solutions (sort of) & I can’t expect my clients to commit to meaningful life change, if I am not willing to walk that path myself.

So I started walking and walking toward change.. Walking is hard. Walking is really hard , and tiring, & it feels like I am walking in circles. Frankly, this path is crap & needs paving! .

Detours were ambiguously marked by anger, frustration, or anxiety.  Dead ends signs screamed TURN BACK NOW!!! THIS IS beyond YOUR control. 

So I set myself on cruise control & instead of wandering in circles, I found THE CIRCLE. I have explained it below in hopes it will pave the way for you too.

Is it in your circle? If the answer is no…LET IT GO!

As you chart your course fellow control freaks…please be kind yourself.  The journey is long & you are are not lost; You are “Under Construction”-Remember to conserve fuel by focusing only on what you have control over.  You’ll need more than your fair share of fuel for the twists & turns ahead.

 

 

Feelings, they come and they go. You are what you remain.

Feelings come and go.
I feel oddly calm and at peace today. Not to imply that feeling calm or at peace is odd, these are quite pleasant feelings in fact. It’s just that I am curious as to where these feelings came from and why they are visiting me today. I often spend time reflecting on what seems wrong or seems worth changing, but rarely do I focus in on what is going right. Which, is worth fixing in and of itself, now that I think of it. Doesn’t it make sense to enhance what feels good instead of trying to change what feels bad?

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