I was woken up in the middle of the night by a storm rolling in. We were on family vacation at a ranch in the middle of nowhere so hearing the wind come in was different than here in the city. Wide open country, the wind swirling around the hills, lightening creating an everlasting glow over the country side.
The mom in me checks the weather app to make sure it is just a thunderstorm while I remember I need to grab our swim suits off the balcony before they blow away. The storm was so strong I had to wake Hubby to help me push the door open. That’s when the storm hit. Hubby asked what all the vague texts on our phone were about…..
My mom had texted after we went to sleep that my Dad was in ICU. Something about him having seizures, calling 911, the meds they gave him have him resting now. “Don’t rush back from your nice trip” she says. It’s 3am. The storm in my brain is swirling now.
Hubby and I try to sit outside to watch the storm as it is an amazing powerful sight, we are both wide awake now, but it is too strong. The storm outside and the storm now within me. So much out of my control. All I know to do is pray.
I am in shock. So many questions thundering through my head. Life can change in a split second, my life just changed.
I was planning on writing about making memories with your family when we returned from vacation but the shock I am in has me thinking more about my family vacations with my parents and has me thinking about how I have been putting off going for a ride in my Dad’s new boat. Carpe Diem is more real right at this second than it was 48 hours ago.
Of course we cut our “nice trip” short, I could not be that far away. I have not seen him yet, between driving back home and ICU hours I did not make it. I’m heading there this morning. As Mom said last night “this just does not seem real.” I have been praying for strength. For my Dad to have strength to fight this, mentally and physically, as he is already sick and tired of hospitals. For my Mom, to have strength as our family is still resettling from her father’s death. For the doctors to have clear thought and the knowledge to care for my Dad. For God to be in control because I know I have none.
Today I hope we get more answers, more direction. Hearing your Dad has multiple brain tumors as well as other liaisons on his lungs with no finer details or direction is like standing in the middle of a storm wondering what is next.
Today I ask that you seize the day, don’t put off for tomorrow what you can do today. Hug your family a little tighter, eat that extra slice of cake, wear the outfit you have been saving for that perfect occasion, call the person you have been meaning to call, go make memories, today.