If You Really Love Your Mother….Let Her Sleep!!!

Mom Madness Month (a.k.a. May) is in full effect and if you are a mom, you know that the odds of getting  good night’s sleep between now and the last day of school are about the same as those of winning the lotto.  For most moms, May might as well be Insomnia Awareness month….it’s a tough time in every mama’s life and when the going gets tough…the tough get going…to the nearest At Home, Home Goods, & Tuesday Morning!

My night stands were beginning to look as old and tired as I feel these days & they needed to be perked up! My design started with these adorable & very affordable prints from At Home.

A simple tray and a few fun coffee table books are always a wise choice for making a statement. I added this fun succulent for a pop of color.e prints from At Home. This quote reminds me to make the most of every single day!

 

 

Ideas to include on your night stand: lip balm, note pad for late night brainstorms & to-do lists, calming pillow spray, fresh flowers, candle, books, coasters, sleep mask

Feather Your Nest This Easter

 

The noblest art is that of making others happy.-

P.T. Barnum

 

As you have probably guessed from following our Happy Mind Happy Home blog, the noble profession of counseling can be both a passionate blessing & curse. Serving  others is a dream come true; but at times, can be taxing on the most sensitive “canary” of soul of mine.

When my mind and heart become burdened, I turn to my other passion, interior design. Feathering my nest restores my soul. I have decided to dedicate future blog posts of the art of feathering one’s nest!

Today, I am sharing my latest project  & announcing that I have embarked on a new venture with my friend Kathy; a booth at The Vineyards Antique & Home Decor Mall in Colleyville. Our booth will feature custom floral arrangement, seasonal items & home decor. My daughter Emerson is even joining the fun with her custom lettering & calligraphy business! Please stop by soon visit  The Noble Nest & Happy Easter…..from my nest to yours!

Layer Wreaths for added flare & volume.

The Mythical Work/Life Balance

When Lisa, Andrea and I decided that our next post topic would be about the biggest mom Everest of them all: Work/Life balance, I admit, I felt a pang of panic because in my own life, I’ve had as much success finding a work/life balance as I have finding an affordable bra that actually fits.

So last week, while out looking for one, I stumbled upon the perfect metaphor for this mythical “balance” experts speak of….and even more ironic….I found it in the party aisle.

Weird I know…but true. Anyone who has ever been to Target knows that it’s just a law of the mom universe that you never actually leave Target with what you came for…this day was no different. Target was (you guessed it) fresh out of bras in my size, but busting at the seams with décor for one of the most unique party themes I’ve ever seen: unicorns and donuts.

I mean, I love me a great party….especially one with a theme, but I have to admit that at first glance, I was a bit confused.

Unicorns I totally get…but donuts? So confused…yes….surprised no….. Of course little girls would love this! Who doesn’t love this???…it’s a unicorn!!! And better yet….a unicorn with a donut….Does it gets any better? Not unless the unicorn does laundry & the donut is soaked in cabernet. I digress…

Indeed, whether you are 5 or 45, unicorns & donuts are pretty damn awesome. This got me thinking about a not so awesome myth we sell to girls and women… the idea that we can create a perfect work/life balance.

So not to rain on anyone’s parade, but the “having it all” myth told to women is pretty much the grown up equivalent to a unicorn and donut birthday party theme. Anyone who has ever been a mom-working or not, realizes that this idealist mom goal feels about as “magical” as a donkey with a gluten free- bagel.

Truth be told, there is nothing magical about it at all.

It’s hard. It’s a constant battle & I’ve been on every battle front: stay at home mom…working mom….part time working mom; you name it, I’ve been there.

I feel guilty when in full on work mode and guilty in full on mom mode…and Lord…when I was “blessed” enough to get to try & do both…not only did I feel guilty, but some days, it was a struggle just to remember my name or the names of the tiny humans I am responsible for.

So as much as I would love to give advice about how to find the right work/life “balance”, the only real piece of advice I can give is to keep moving forward. Move forward and keep searching….for balance, for bras & for unicorns too. Why not? Because the bad news is that unicorns don’t exist but the good news is: donuts do.

Playtime

You can discover more about a person in an hour of play than a year in conversation.

I often recommend play therapy to parents whose young children are struggling emotionally and behaviorally. As you can probably imagine, this recommendation is often met with a blank stare. Reluctant and a bit skeptical, parents often underestimate the power of using play in the therapy process. 

Play therapy is for children, what talk therapy is for adults & play therapy happens to be one of the most effective ways of helping children navigate the complicated and often emotionally trying process of growing up. Play therapy is a structured, theoretically based approach to therapy that builds on the normal communicative and learning processes of children. Play is a child’s language, and it is through therapeutic play that children learn to:

  • Assume greater self-responsibility
  • Become more self-directed
  • Become more self-accepting
  • Become more self-reliant
  • Engage in self-determined decision making
  • Experience a feeling of control over his/her environment, thus reducing generalized anxiety
  • Become sensitive to the process of coping
  • Develop an internal source of evaluation
  • Become more trusting of self.

Play therapy is best suited for children ages 3-12, however, in recent years, play therapy has been used with toddlers as well. The toys in the play therapy room are specifically selected to allow a child to explore social roles, such as nurturing baby dolls or dress up like a police officer. Therapists are trained to notice patterns & themes in a child’s play as a way of helping the child resolve internal struggles & move towards healing.

Therapy sessions vary in length, but generally last between 30-45 minutes. Research suggests that it takes an average of 20 sessions to resolve the problems of the typical child referred for treatment. Of course, some children may improve much faster while more serious or ongoing problems may take longer to resolve.

If you think your child could benefit from play therapy or have any further questions about this powerful treatment modality, don’t hesitate to contact me at Family Connections Counseling (817-545-7100) or find out more information at the Association for Play Therapy (www.A4PT.org).

“We don’t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.”-George Bernard Shaw

A New Approach to Wellness & Weight Loss

New Year…New You? …Not so Fast!

If you are like millions of Americans, the past few weeks have been a mix of recovering from the merriment/madness of the holidays & contemplating change.

We all know the drill, January 1st rolls around & gets us thinking about what is and is not working in our lives. If only for a few days, making a commitment towards positive change seems like an obtainable goal.
For many, this positive change involves losing weight. Every January 1st, I leap onto the weight loss band wagon, only to be derailed at the first sight of cheese & wine.
So why is it so difficult to develop & maintain healthier habits? 

By now, the “how’ is no mystery. I’m no rocket scientist and I really really hate math, but I understand that my calories out have to be less than calories in. Nevertheless, study after study indicates that while many succeed in in losing some weight, the long term results are usually poor. Why is it so hard then to stick to a healthy eating plan and a reasonable exercise regime? I’m a mom, so I could give you a thousand reasons…stress, time, lack of planning, picky children, wine. If you are R.E.A.L. Tired Housewife, the reasons truly are endless.

So this year, I am taking a different approach to better health. It’s one that I actually know quite well but have never thought to apply to the areas of weight and wellness. (Talk about a light bulb moment!) It’s no secret that  I constantly sing the praises of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy.  I am so passionate about this approach to maintaining one’s mental health, that I use it as my primary strategy when working with clients of all ages.

Image result for quotes about changing yourself

So it stands to reason that if faulty thinking patterns contribute a host of mental health problems, it might also be the reason they remain unable to finally achieve the healthy lifestyle they  so desperately aspire to.

I would suspect that it is because knowing what to do & knowing how to get yourself to do it are entirely separate skills. Getting ourselves to create new habits depends largely on the silent conversation we have with ourselves: our thoughts. 

Since I would never ask a client to do something I would not be willing to do myself, the ideas that come next are going to be tested first and foremost on me. I’ll agree to be my own guinea pig.

Let me state for the record that I am not focusing on losing weight. I have wasted way too much of my precious life focusing on a number on a scale. No longer a slave to the scale, what matters to me most is how I feel on a daily basis. So the goal is: be a little less tired real housewife. 

  I’ll first work to identify destructive thoughts keeping me from  achieving my wellness goals. Once those are identified, I will develop strategies to actively challenge and change those thoughts into more helpful ones. I ask clients to do this all of the time and I am their accountability coach. You then, friends & readers, will be my accountability guide.

So what does this actually look like in real Mom Life?  I’ll create cards on a ring to record new, more helpful thoughts & keep these cards in a prominent place..i.e. kitchen, car, office, or any place where I tend to lose focus and motivation. If you have children, (that’s basically everywhere and anywhere). Think of it almost as a portable vision board of words!

Here are a few examples of thoughts I plan to tackle:

  • Old: I have tried eating healthier before and always fall back into my old patterns.

NEW: Changing my thoughts has led to great gains in mental health for me and this time I’m applying those techniques to wellness. 

  • Old: My family is full of picky eaters and they won’t be supportive of this new way of eating.

NEW: My family has supported my goals in the past and will be inspired when I succeed.

  • I will have to be much less social if I change my eating & drinking patterns, and being with friends is a huge part of my life that I am not willing to give up.

NEW: I can & will still go out with friends, but I can  plan what I will eat/drink in advance & not waiver from that. I will surround myself with people who have like-minded goals and bring out the best in me by supporting my positive changes.

Using note cards to keep it real & stay motivated..
I love this reminder that this journey is about progress not perfection.

 

As I say often, the goal is progress, not perfection. I know I won’t be perfect on this journey to wellness, but I promise to keep you posted on my progress and cheer you on if you too decide to make 2018 a year of change.

R.E.A.L. Housewives

“It was the best of times. It was the worst of times.” – Charles Dickens

     

Good old Charles….He pretty much summed up motherhood while singlehandedly managing to write a classic tale of two cities.

I’ll be honest that lately mommin’ has just felt like the worst of times…I.e…Waking up with Shelf Elf Anxiety (It’s really a thing people!!!) & coming to grips with guilt over with my decision to honor the Bad Moms Christmas movie & not send Christmas cards this year (Sorry Mom… In advance.)

So when my BFF Shelly and I were invited to a Real Housewives Themed Bunco party, I was super stoked. This tired mama more than needed a night out!.

Full disclosure, I proudly claim The Real Housewives of Anywhere one of my most thrilling & yet equally embarrassing guilty pleasures.

The invite challenged us to embody either our favorite housewife or the housewife we most related to…

Which one? Which one? The possibilities were endless.

Luckily for me, there was a handy dandy quiz to help me find out.

  • Did I recently jet off to another state in search of a miniature pony? Um No.

     
     

  • Did I sell my 10 million dollar house, only to upsize to one with 15 bathrooms with a champagne bell conveniently located in the master closet? Not unless screaming at my husband from 3 rooms away to bring me a glass of wine counts? I’m guessing probably not.

 

  • Was my biggest stressor in life finding the perfect outfit to wear to my annual White party? (Nope again) I digress, but WHAT?

    Who in their right mind has a white party? Don’t people know how hard it is to get red wine stains out of clothing?? Strike 3.

After trudging through the extremely thoughtful yet super shallow & super depressing 5 questions, my results were in…..

Wait…WHAT?

UMNO!!!!!!!!

Turns out that the housewife I was most compatible with was not even on my radar, let alone one of my top 5 faves.

So when I called my sister from another mister to discuss my dismal quiz results & our equally dismal costume options, she had the perfect response…

“Do we really have to dress up? Can’t we just go as the real $%$^&&ing housewives we are? TIRED ONES!!!!REAL TIRED ONES!!!””

Yes!!! Yes!! I thought to myself. Instantly I felt a sense of relief (This is why Shelly is my ETERNAL ride or die-What would I do without her? )

Turns out, we didn’t even need a costume. We could just wear the yoga pants we’ve had on for 3 days straight.(Don’t be grossed out…We didn’t actually exercise in them.. WHO HAS TIME TO ACTUALLY EXERCISE?)

Part two of our costume could be our Tarje’ sweatshirts that sport our Coffee til Cocktails mantra. Truth be told, most days can’t we just skip straight to the cocktails???

So here’s to all of the REAL housewives out there!….R.E.A.L. tired ones. Not sure you qualify? Just take my handy dandy quiz!

Are you or have you ever been….

  • R….eady to shank anyone who messes with your kid?
  • E…specially irritable and easily annoyed (ALL the time by___(Anything & everything)?
  • A…lways broke from buying kid crap, sending your kid to summer camp, creating a wardrobe for your Elf on the Shelf? (Philosophical question: Does an Elf really NEED a motorcycle jacket?
  • L…ast but certainly not least…Literally on the verge of a nervous breakdown?

Well congrats …if you answered yes to even one of these questions…You are
a REAL HOUSEWIFE!!!

The quiz options are endless…

(R) running on empty?

(E) ating leftover goldfish randomly plucked from the center console of your mini-van or mid-sized S.U.V.?

(A)lways late!

(L)iking annoying people’s posts on FACEBOOK?…(YAY! I’m so freaking glad you just returned from a 2 week vaca in Greece whilst the most exciting place I ventured to this week was the Colleyville Post Office…ETERNAL EYE ROLL!

In a cruel twist of Charles Dickens like fate, after all of this costume planning & pondering, the long anticipated bunco party got canceled because …..

You guessed it….We were all too tired!!!!

Here’s to you REAL HOUSEWIVES everywhere!

Whether you are tossing tables, coordinating outfits for your hairless cats OR more likely, just trying to get through the day without killing someone who shares your D.N.A. , you will be ok. ..eventually anyway. It will all be ok-one of these days.

Just focus on getting through the next 10 minutes or do what my favorite author Glennon Melton Doyle says, ” Just do the next right thing.” Those 6 words have gotten me through many a mom-life crisis. Just do the next right REAL
thing. Thank you to all of the moms who help me remember that tired or not, we are all just “keeping it REAL!”

  

Frighteningly Affordable Party Decorating

In previous posts I have declared my undying love for the .99 Cent Store. Thus when you pair my favorite store with my favorite holiday, you can begin to imagine all of the creativity that ensues. This year was all the more fun because my son decided on a Nightmare Before Christmas Themed birthday party.

This declaration came as a pleasant surprise considering the fact that his previous party theme suggestion was an alien luau….(Yes…you read that correctly!) While he certainly gets 2 gold stars for creativity, my thoughts were… W.T.H??. and N.O.

As much as party planning makes me giddy, I was literally at a loss with that one. There aren’t enough dollar stores in the world to get that idea off the ground. Needless to say, I took the Nightmare theme and ran with it…straight to Hobby Lobby and the  .99 Cent Store.

I have included party pics below and a few tips for making .99 cents look like a million bucks.  All items shown were purchased at a dollar store, Hobby Lobby, Target Dollar spot or Ross with the exception of the Jack Skellington Stuffed centerpiece..He was a splurge!  

Happy Holidays from my family to yours!

Tip 1: Layer several place mats and dishes to add visual interest. These are dollar store place mats!

 

 

 


 

 

 

Tip 2: Tuck little surprises into unexpected places. This dollar store spider peeks out to greet little party guests at the front door.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

      More dollar store finds!
Tip 3: DIY! This banner was a do it yourself craft from Hobby Lobby. I added some tissue paper poms & a furry friend.               
Tip 4: Think outside the cauldron & use items in ways other than what they were intended for. This chair cover is stuffed with a standard sized pillow to add comfort & fun to the outdoor seating area.

 

Dollar store hanging pumpkins work perfectly perched atop outdoor urns.

Tip 5: Use every day items you already have around your house to decorate. This table runner is actually just wrapping paper from Hobby Lobby.

Enough

How many more ? How many more precious souls will be lost before we collectively seek to understand and heal the underlying causes of mass murder in America?

As a mental health professional, I wish I could say I was hopeful about finding a solution but unfortunately, I am not.  If we did not make this horrific problem a priority the day 26 innocent children & teachers were senselessly slaughtered in their classrooms, I fear we never will.

enough Continue reading

I AM THAT GIRL

GIRLS MATTER.

Girls receive over 3,000 messages a day telling them what they aren’t and I AM THAT GIRL exists to help them celebrate what they are.  I am that girl is a movement inspiring girls to love, express, and be exactly who they are.

My Girl…You have a beautiful heart and a beautiful mind. I love you! Mom

They have several local chapters of forward thinking girls & women on High School and College campuses. These chapters work to shift girl culture in America, by raising the standards for how girls treat themselves, each other, and the world.

When I spotted this noble venture on line, I was reminded that Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is rooted in exploring and challenging negative core beliefs individuals have about ourselves,  others, and the world. This type of therapy teaches the skills necessary to overcome negative & destructive patterns of thinking.

Cognitive behavioral therapy also helps to identify which factors are playing a role in maintaining a negative body image and works to address each one by teaching the skills necessary to allow healing to occur.

Once the negative thoughts have been identified and evaluated for truthfulness, it is time to replace them with positive, productive thoughts that create a favorable outcome. this involves practice and dedication but has been demonstrated to be extremely effective in breaking the cycle of negative thinking.

“As you grow older, you will discover that you have two hands. One for helping yourself, the other for helping others.” Maya Angelou

If you or someone you know suffers from body image problems, low self esteem, or body dysmorphic disorder, I would encourage you to contact a counselor in your area for guidance and support. Please take a minute today to visit I AM THAT GIRL.COM and take the pledge today!  I have done it…Now it’s your turn. http://www.iamthatgirl.com/

I, Angie Glancy, am that girl…

I have a brilliant heart and a beautiful mind. I am me, an amazing work in progress, and perfectly flawed. I promise to lift other girls up, have their backs, and make it safe for them to be exactly who they are. I’m on a mission to raise the standards for how we treat each other, how we treat ourselves, and how we treat the world. Every time I look in the mirror I’ll remind myself that I’m not alone, that my voice matters, and that I am enough.

 

https://instagram.com/iamthatgirl